Last Friday afternoon (not Black Friday, the one before Thanksgiving), Hayden came home to tell me that his friend at school, Joshua, would not be returning to school until 2nd grade. I was a little shocked. I knew that he had been sick and had been in the hospital, but Hayden didn't really know what was wrong with him.
So I asked Hayden why he wouldn't be back, and Hayden said, "He has two diseases."
I'm thinking, "WHAT???"
And then he goes on to say, "And he needs some sort of therapy."
As a very cold chill was running down my spine, and my whole body went numb, I had to ask, "Hayden, does he have to have chemotherapy?"
"Yeah!!! That's what he has to do!"
So then, as everything was clicking I said, "Hayden, does Joshua have Leukemia?"
"Yeah! And some other disease."
"Lymphoma?"
"Yeah! That's the one. How'd you know that, Mommy?"
And then I went on to explain that while I don't know a lot about those diseases, I once ran a marathon to raise money for the Leukemia and Lymphoma society.
The next Monday morning, I asked Hayden's teacher about Joshua. She explained that she had known what was going on for a while, but they didn't want to tell the kids until they knew more about his treatment and how long he would be out of school. She then told me that his family had started a blog to document each day for friends and family that couldn't be with him.
Hayden and I have been reading it every day and sending him messages so that he knows his friends haven't forgotten about him. This will be a tough month for Joshua and his family. While he is responding well to treatment, his white blood cell count is not high enough for him to go home. It looks like he will most likely be spending Christmas in the hospital. So if everyone could just keep him and his family in your prayers, I know he could use it. He's only six years old, stuck in the hospital, undergoing chemo and blood transfusions every few days, and his hair has just started to come out. I can only imagine how Hayden would be reacting to all of that.
3 comments:
That is just heartbreaking, Scarlett. I can't even imagine what they are going through. I will absolutely keep him in our prayers. Thanks for putting the link to their blog - as hard as it is to read b/c it could be any of us & our child - it is great to see their wonderful spirit & love.
This is incredibly sad. I am a little surprised that the teacher didn't consult with the parents first or have the parents part of the discussion. I think how you helped Hayden to understand it was very nice and compassionate. I think reading the blog daily can only make people stronger and grateful..
Debbie - I think the teacher just wanted to be matter-of-fact about the whole thing so as not to scare the kids too much. Hayden has no idea how serious it really is. I've told him that Joshua needs our prayers, and he's very very sick, and we need to make sure to keep in touch so he knows his friends miss him and haven't forgotten about him. Hayden's teacher has organized the kids so that each week a table in their class will write him letters. And when he loses his hair, she said that they will get a picture of him and they will make "alternative" hairdos and tattoos and things for his head, so he will be able to "try them on" his picture. I think they're just trying to keep everything as lighthearted as possible and even get a little fun out of it for Joshua, but it's tough to know exactly what to do and say. It's a horrible situation no matter what.
Andrea - my thoughts were just that. Leukemia doesn't discriminate - this could be any one of our kids - and even though I don't know Joshua like Hayden does, I have felt very close to this situation. Does that make sense? This little boy sat right next to Hayden every day. His parents didn't even know anything was wrong with him. I just wish there was something I could do, but I know there's really nothing. I'm trying to help Hayden be a good friend even when he can't see Joshua. That's a tough thing to explain to a six year old. I'm also throwing around the idea of doing another marathon in a few years for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. I've always known I wanted to do another one - I had such a positive experience the first time back in 2000 - but now I might get to actually choose my own patient-ambassador.
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